Springfield Nuclear: A Pennant Winning Team?

Nuclear power tycoon C. Montgomery Burns is a man used to having his way. Whether it's a child's plaything he's after, or a million dollar bet with the owner of a rival team, he's willing to skirt, bend, and break rules to get what he wants and maintain his own high standard for excellency. Twenty-one years ago today, Burns assembled perhaps the most talked about team in history*. His "Springfield 9" was a collection of stars expected to win not just a beer league softball crown, but the 1992 World Series as well.

On the anniversary of that occasion, I thought it appropriate to look back at that team, not only to remember what became of them that year (oddly enough, while a documentary on their spring training and footage of one game against Shelbyville are regularly televised, the 1992 season itself is rarely discussed), but also to muse about why it happened.

Baseball Players and Presidents

A federal holiday honoring George Washington began in 1879, when all government offices in the District of Columbia were closed on February 22, Washington's birth date. In 1971 the Uniform  Monday Holiday Act took effect, moving all federal holidays to designated Mondays. The holiday is now most commonly known as Presidents Day, but is still officially designated "Washington's Birthday." It is celebrated on the third Monday in February (odd, since that means it never falls on Washington's actual birthday), which is why I'm not at work today. To honor the highest office in our nation, I'm putting together a baseball team, made entirely of players who share their surname with a U.S. President.

Felix Hernandez and Seattle Make a Commitment

Felix Hernandez, one of the best pitchers in baseball and still just 26 years old, has reportedly agreed to a new contract with the Mariners that will lock him through 2019 and pay him $175 million. USA Today's Bob Nightengale first broke the news, reporting that the new deal would start immediately, replacing Hernandez's old contract, which ran through 2014. That would be an AAV (annual average value) of $25M for the next seven years. Later, ESPN's Buster Olney reported the previous deal is still in place, paying Felix $39.5M over the next two years, with a $135.5M extension added to it, an AAV of $27.1M from 2015-2019. Either way, the total money and AAV will both be the highest ever for a pitcher.

Stan Musial: An Appreciation of the Man

I have no memories of Stan Musial smashing baseballs across the National League, having arrived on this Earth more than sixteen years after he collected hit number 3,630 in the final at bat of his career, September 29th, 1963. While I would love to have seen him play, the record books are emphatic about his greatness as a player. The stories told of him also make clear he was quite a man. The news that Musial passed away yesterday has saddened many, but we should also reflect on the knowledge that at 92 years of age and surrounded by family, he went about as well as anyone can hope to.

2012: The Year in Movies

The award traditionally given to the best film
of the year is a green guy in a garbage can.

I tend to see what most people would consider to be a lot of movies. This began about as soon as I was old enough to be allowed to go to a theater with friends, by the time I was 15 I was going to a movie almost every week. In 1997 I saw 50 movies, and while I don't make it to the theater quite as often as I used to, but innovations like Netflix and Red Box have allowed me to keep up with new releases from home, and every year I've managed to see at least 50 new releases. Every year until 2012 that is. I've seen only 47 movies from last year. Shameful. No one is more disappointed in me than me. I thought about a marathon of whatever the Red Box had last weekend, but decided against it.

My 2013 Hall of Fame Ballot

Wednesday afternoon the 2013 Baseball Hall of Fame voting results will be released. It is one of the deepest ballots in history, with over a dozen qualified candidates, including two of the very best players in baseball history. It may come as a surprise then (to those of you who normally pay little to no attention to this sort of things) that there will probably be zero candidates actually elected for induction. Why? Performance enhancing drugs (steroids, etc.), unsubstantiated rumors, intellectual dishonesty, and a voting body that is significantly out-to-lunch on modern baseball and advanced statistics. I'd like to briefly address some of those issues, and then present my own (obviously hypothetical) Hall of Fame ballot (which you can scroll to the bottom for, if that's what you're interested in).

My Age 32 Season

It's January 5th, my birthday. It took only a few minutes to know this will be a great year for me, because as soon as I was awake, my girlfriend insisted on giving me presents, which included the incredible sleeping bag you see to the right. It may smell bad, but it'll keep me warm until she gets the shelter up (The sleeping bag is a tauntaun, which Rebel troops rode to get around on the ice planet Hoth in "The Empire Strikes Back." Han Solo cut his open to keep Luke Skywalker from freezing to death. But you already knew that, right? ...RIGHT?!). I'm happy to be 33 (Yes, I still enjoy Star Wars' themed gifts at that age, what of it?), especially because studies show it's the happiest age there is. But before I move fully into this new age, I thought it would be good to pause and take a look back at my age 32 season, among the most memorable and significant I've had.

Torii Hunter's Sad, Bigoted View

The Detroit Tigers' new right fielder recently told Kevin Baxter of the Los Angeles Times (for an article published Sunday) that an openly gay teammate would be divisive in the locker room. "For me, as a Christian... I will be uncomfortable because in all my teachings and all my learning, biblically, it's not right. It will be difficult and uncomfortable." I do not doubt that when (not if, because the day will come, sooner or later), for the first time, an active professional athlete in America comes out publicly, it will be divisive, but Hunter (and others who would side with him) should be taken to task for being on the wrong side of that divide.

Star Wars: What Happens Next?

Last Wednesday I got a text from my girlfriend, which is how I learned Disney has paid $4 billion for Lucasfilm and would begin production on Star Wars: Episode VII with the intention of releasing it in 2015, followed by sequels in 2017 and 2019. My reply text was a combination of shocked excitement and confused nonsense. I spent the rest of the day thinking about it, without ever quite figuring out quite how I felt. I'm still not sure, but I've at least had time to organize my thoughts into (semi) coherence. In Part I I wrote about the place the Star Wars galaxy has held in my life. Now I try to examine what the Disney deal means to me.

Star Wars: My Life Far, Far Away

Last Wednesday I learned about Disney's deal to buy LucasFilm from George Lucas for $4 billion and their announcement of a new trilogy to begin production soon, sending a new Star Wars movie into theaters in 2015. It was huge news for anyone (like me) who has loved the Star Wars galaxy for years. First, I want to share a bit about how Star Wars has fit into my life, ever since before I can even remember. These stories are probably similar to those of many others my age. In Part II I'll try to sort out and make sense of my reactions to the Disney news.